wither in the light

Bill Thomas' Suicide picture series may provide him with a means of dealing with death on his own terms, but I can't look at his Rube Goldberg contraptions without thinking of the suicide bunnies.

The title of this post is from a joke my friend Scott, who committed suicide three years ago, told me. Scott was quiet, anything but crass, never swore, and had a pretty sophisticated sense of humor, so the rare occasions when he'd stoop to the level of the rest of our bunch stand out in my head. Like this one:

3 men, wandering lost in the jungle, unwittingly trespass on sacred ground and are brought to a nearby village by angry tribesmen.

"Choose your punishment," the tribal leader says: "death, or boomwha."

The first guy says "That's an easy choice... I'll take boomwha."

"Very well," says the leader. "BOOMWHA." Then the biggest, meanest warrior picks the guy up, drags him over to a fallen tree, and re-enacts a couple of the more traumatic scenes from the movie Deliverance on the unfortunate guy. Throughout the whole ordeal the tribesmen are chanting "BOOMWHA! BOOMWHA! BOOMWHA!" Afterwards the guy is set free, and sentencing falls on the second man.

"Choose your punishment," the tribal leader says: "death, or boomwha."

The second guy says "umm... I... guess... I'll take boomwha too."

"Very well," says the leader. "BOOMWHA." Then the second guy is grabbed by another big mean warrior and the whole ordeal is repeated. Afterwards he too is freed, and sentencing falls on the third man.

"Choose your punishment," the tribal leader says: "death, or boomwha."

The third guy says "fuck that... I'll take death".

"Very well," says the leader. "DEATH BY BOOMWHA."