Monday, January 05, 2004

I can hardly wait

Fellow sinners, rejoice! The annoying Jesus-freak in the next cubicle, the missionaries knocking on your door, and the bitchy neighbor who is always giving you the stank-eye are soon going to do you a big favor and get the hell off of this planet. But don't be alarmed... they are caring folk, in their own self-righteous way, so they've gone to the trouble of leaving a message behind for you to ponder during your eternal damnation:

Dear Friend;

This message has been sent to you by a friend or a relative who has recently disappeared along with millions and millions of people around the world.

The reason they chose to send you this letter is because they cared about you and would like you to know the truth about where they went.

This may come as a shock to you, but the one who sent you this has been taken up to heaven.

If you too would like to have a letter sent to your sinner friends after you are taken up by the Rapture, go to RaptureLetters.com.